There are so many girls, and so few princes.

There are so many girls, and so few princes.

Nature makes boys and girls lovely to look upon so they can be tolerated until they acquire some sense.

Nature makes boys and girls lovely to look upon so they can be tolerated until they acquire some sense.

The restlessness that comes upon girls upon summer evenings results in lasting trouble unless it is speedily controlled. The right read more

The restlessness that comes upon girls upon summer evenings results in lasting trouble unless it is speedily controlled. The right kind of man does not look for a wife on the streets, and the right kind of girl waits till the man comes to her home for her.

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty read more

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT'S relativity.

I am fond of children--except boys.

I am fond of children--except boys.

A girl should be two things: classy and fabulous.

A girl should be two things: classy and fabulous.

Last night I discovered a new form of oral contraceptive. I asked a girl to go to bed with me read more

Last night I discovered a new form of oral contraceptive. I asked a girl to go to bed with me and she said no.

It's the good girls who keep the diaries; the bad girls never have the time.

It's the good girls who keep the diaries; the bad girls never have the time.

Little girls, I am in the business of putting old heads on young shoulders, and all my pupils are the read more

Little girls, I am in the business of putting old heads on young shoulders, and all my pupils are the crème de la crème. Give me a girl at an impressionable age and she is mine for life.