And whether you're an honest man, or whether you're a thief, Depends on whose solicitor has given me my brief.

And whether you're an honest man, or whether you're a thief, Depends on whose solicitor has given me my brief.

To some lawyers, all facts are created equal.

To some lawyers, all facts are created equal.

Lawyers are like morticians. We all need one sooner or later, but better later than sooner.

Lawyers are like morticians. We all need one sooner or later, but better later than sooner.

I never saw a lawyer yet who would admit he was making money.

I never saw a lawyer yet who would admit he was making money.

A good lawyer is a bad neighbor.

A good lawyer is a bad neighbor.

Self-defense is the clearest of all laws, and for this reason: lawyers didn't make it.

Self-defense is the clearest of all laws, and for this reason: lawyers didn't make it.

Lawyers are men who hire out their words and anger.

Lawyers are men who hire out their words and anger.

A lawyer's dream of heaven: every man reclaimed his property at the resurrection, and each tried to recover it from read more

A lawyer's dream of heaven: every man reclaimed his property at the resurrection, and each tried to recover it from all his forefathers.

It took man thousands of years to put words down on paper, and his lawyers still wish he wouldn't.

It took man thousands of years to put words down on paper, and his lawyers still wish he wouldn't.