Marriage is popular because it combines the maximum of temptation
with the maximum of opportunity.

Marriage is popular because it combines the maximum of temptation
with the maximum of opportunity.

Don't marry the person you think you can live with; marry only the individual you think you can't live without.

Don't marry the person you think you can live with; marry only the individual you think you can't live without.

What God hath joined together no man shall put asunder; God will
take care of that.

What God hath joined together no man shall put asunder; God will
take care of that.

No married man is genuinely happy if he has to drink worse whisky than he used to drink when he read more

No married man is genuinely happy if he has to drink worse whisky than he used to drink when he was single.

Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.

Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.

Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed.

Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed.

A great poet has seldom sung of lawfully wedded happiness, but of free and secret love; and in this respect, read more

A great poet has seldom sung of lawfully wedded happiness, but of free and secret love; and in this respect, too the time is coming when there will no longer be one standard of morality for poetry and another for life. To anyone tender of conscience, the ties formed by a free connection are stronger than the legal ones.

She cried, and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook.

She cried, and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook.

I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. First, let her think she's having read more

I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. First, let her think she's having her own way. And second, let her have it.