Last night I discovered a new form of oral contraceptive. I asked a girl to go to bed with me read more

Last night I discovered a new form of oral contraceptive. I asked a girl to go to bed with me and she said no.

Many men in love with a dimple makes the mistake of marrying the whole girl.

Many men in love with a dimple makes the mistake of marrying the whole girl.

When a girl ceases to blush, she has lost the most powerful charm of her beauty

When a girl ceases to blush, she has lost the most powerful charm of her beauty

A girl is Innocence playing in the mud, Beauty standing on its head, and Motherhood dragging a doll by the read more

A girl is Innocence playing in the mud, Beauty standing on its head, and Motherhood dragging a doll by the foot.

A great catch is like watching girls go by the last one you see is always the prettiest.

A great catch is like watching girls go by the last one you see is always the prettiest.

Big girls need big diamonds.

Big girls need big diamonds.

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty read more

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT'S relativity.

I never cared for fashion much, amusing little seams and witty little pleats: it was the girls I liked.

I never cared for fashion much, amusing little seams and witty little pleats: it was the girls I liked.

I really can't deny it, I am who I am. I'm pretty normal. I'm not that smooth type of girl. read more

I really can't deny it, I am who I am. I'm pretty normal. I'm not that smooth type of girl. I run into things, I trip, I spill food. I say stupid things... I really don't have it all together.