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Maxioms by Dave Barry

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Violence and smut are of course everywhere on the airwaves. You cannot turn on your television without seeing them, although read more

Violence and smut are of course everywhere on the airwaves. You cannot turn on your television without seeing them, although sometimes you have to hunt around.

by Dave Barry Found in: Violence Quotes,
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Scientists tell us that the fastest animal on earth, with a top speed of 120 ft/sec, is a cow that read more

Scientists tell us that the fastest animal on earth, with a top speed of 120 ft/sec, is a cow that has been dropped out of a helicopter.

by Dave Barry Found in: Society Quotes,
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Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons that you cannot see with the naked eye unless read more

Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you have been drinking.

by Dave Barry Found in: Electricity Quotes,
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Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games in Chicago in January, only read more

Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games in Chicago in January, only more intelligent.

by Dave Barry Found in: Football Quotes,
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Eternal boyhood is the dream of a depressing percentage of American males, and the locker room is the temple where read more

Eternal boyhood is the dream of a depressing percentage of American males, and the locker room is the temple where they worship arrested development.

by Dave Barry Found in: Men and women Quotes,
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