Dave Barry

Democracy: In which you say what you like and do what you're told.

Democracy: In which you say what you like and do what you're told.

If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to read more

If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there are men on base.

I care about our young people, and I wish them great success, because they are our Hope for the Future, read more

I care about our young people, and I wish them great success, because they are our Hope for the Future, and some day, when my generation retires, they will have to pay us trillions of dollars in social security

A thunderstorm is God's way of saying you spend too much time in front of the computer

A thunderstorm is God's way of saying you spend too much time in front of the computer

Politicians are like diapers. They both need changing regularly and for the same reason.

Politicians are like diapers. They both need changing regularly and for the same reason.