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Maxioms by Dave Barry

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Americans who travel abroad for the first time are often shocked to discover that, despite all the progress that has read more

Americans who travel abroad for the first time are often shocked to discover that, despite all the progress that has been made in the last 30 years, many foreign people still speak in foreign languages

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If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving infant's life, she will choose to save read more

If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there is a man on base.

by Dave Barry Found in: Sports:baseball Quotes,
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New York Taxi Rules:1. Driver speaks no English.2. Driver just got here two days ago from someplace like Segal.3. Driver read more

New York Taxi Rules:1. Driver speaks no English.2. Driver just got here two days ago from someplace like Segal.3. Driver hates you.

by Dave Barry Found in: New york Quotes,
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Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large organizations habitually engage in only because they cannot read more

Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large organizations habitually engage in only because they cannot masturbate

by Dave Barry Found in: Meetings Quotes,
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We journalists... are also extremely impressed with scientists, and we will, frankly, print just about any wacky thing they tell read more

We journalists... are also extremely impressed with scientists, and we will, frankly, print just about any wacky thing they tell us, especially if it involves outer space.

by Dave Barry Found in: Scientists Quotes,
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