"Chumps always make the best husbands. When you marry, Sally, grab a chump. Tap his forehead first, and if it read more

"Chumps always make the best husbands. When you marry, Sally, grab a chump. Tap his forehead first, and if it rings solid, don't hesitate."

My idea of walking into the jaws of death is marrying some woman who has lost three husbands.

My idea of walking into the jaws of death is marrying some woman who has lost three husbands.

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open

There is so little difference between husbands you might as well keep the first.

There is so little difference between husbands you might as well keep the first.

His purity was too great, his aspiration too high for this poor, miserable world! His great soul is now only read more

His purity was too great, his aspiration too high for this poor, miserable world! His great soul is now only enjoying that for which it was worthy!

The husbands of very beautiful women belong to the criminal classes.

The husbands of very beautiful women belong to the criminal classes.

Husbands are like fires. They go out when unattended.

Husbands are like fires. They go out when unattended.

A husband is what's left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.

A husband is what's left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.

You can have all the intelligence in the world and don't have enough stamina. I have seen some very bright, read more

You can have all the intelligence in the world and don't have enough stamina. I have seen some very bright, bright women who do not have the stamina for husbands.