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Borrow money from a pessimist - they don't expect it back

Borrow money from a pessimist - they don't expect it back

by Janeane Garofalo Found in: Funny Quotes,
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  16  /  20  

Do not stand in a place of danger trusting in miracles.

Do not stand in a place of danger trusting in miracles.

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A girl phoned me the other day and said... 'Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over. Nobody was read more

A girl phoned me the other day and said... 'Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over. Nobody was home.

by Rodney Dangerfield Found in: Funny Quotes,
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  14  /  20  

If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.

If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.

by Fran Lebowitz Found in: Funny Quotes,
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  37  /  46  

Don't play for safety--it's the most dangerous thing in the world.

Don't play for safety--it's the most dangerous thing in the world.

by Hugh Walpole Found in: Danger Quotes,
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Nothing in the world is more dangerous than a sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.

Nothing in the world is more dangerous than a sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.

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I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.

I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.

by Groucho Marx Found in: Funny Quotes,
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How great are the dangers I face to win a good name in Athens.

How great are the dangers I face to win a good name in Athens.

by Alexander, The Great Found in: Danger Quotes,
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I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them read more

I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them later.

by Mitch Hedberg Found in: Funny Quotes,
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