Friends are like bras: close to your heart and there for support.

Friends are like bras: close to your heart and there for support.

I buy expensive suits. They just look cheap on me.

I buy expensive suits. They just look cheap on me.

There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full.

There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full.

A good friend can tell you what is the matter with you in a minute. He may not seem such read more

A good friend can tell you what is the matter with you in a minute. He may not seem such a good friend after telling.

I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.

I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.

Mistakes are a part of being human. Appreciate your mistakes for what they are: precious life lessons that can only read more

Mistakes are a part of being human. Appreciate your mistakes for what they are: precious life lessons that can only be learned the hard way. Unless it's a fatal mistake, which, at least, others can learn from.

Actually I don't remember being born, it must have happened during one of my black outs.

Actually I don't remember being born, it must have happened during one of my black outs.

It is better to be beautiful than to be good, but it is better to be good than to be read more

It is better to be beautiful than to be good, but it is better to be good than to be ugly.

Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards?

Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards?