The only time people dislike gossip is when you gossip about them.

The only time people dislike gossip is when you gossip about them.

There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full.

There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full.

Whatever is popular deserves attention.

Whatever is popular deserves attention.

Gossip is what no one claims to like -- but everyone enjoys.

Gossip is what no one claims to like -- but everyone enjoys.

Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards?

Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards?

Gossip is the art of saying nothing in a way that leaves practically nothing unsaid.

Gossip is the art of saying nothing in a way that leaves practically nothing unsaid.

That which is everybody's business is nobody's business.

That which is everybody's business is nobody's business.

If you were half as funny as you think you are, you'd be twice as funny as you are now.

If you were half as funny as you think you are, you'd be twice as funny as you are now.

I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.

I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.