The chief function of the body is to carry the brain around.

The chief function of the body is to carry the brain around.

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in read more

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her.

Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime.

Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime.

There's no half-singing in the shower, you're either a rock star or an opera diva.

There's no half-singing in the shower, you're either a rock star or an opera diva.

In all matters of opinion, our adversaries are insane.

In all matters of opinion, our adversaries are insane.

Half the lies they tell about me aren't true.

Half the lies they tell about me aren't true.

I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle.

I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle.

I can whistle with my fingers, especially if I have a whistle.

I can whistle with my fingers, especially if I have a whistle.

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are read more

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes.