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Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself
Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself
Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story read more
Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.
The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep.
The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep.
What you get free costs too much.
What you get free costs too much.
When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren’t smart enough read more
When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren’t smart enough to get out of jury duty.
I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight.
I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight.
A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
After one look at this planet any visitor from outer space would say, “I want to see the manager.”
After one look at this planet any visitor from outer space would say, “I want to see the manager.”
Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.
Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.
