Maxioms Pet

X
Share to:

You May Also Like   /   View all maxioms

  ( comments )
  7  /  12  

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.

by W. C. Fields Found in: Funny Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  48  /  20  

I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.

I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.

by Groucho Marx Found in: Funny Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  26  /  23  

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans

by John Lennon Found in: Funny Quotes, Planning Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  10  /  16  

I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle.

I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle.

by Mitch Hedberg Found in: Funny Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  48  /  22  

Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime.

Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime.

by Red Skelton Found in: Funny Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  32  /  23  

I speak two languages, Body and English.

I speak two languages, Body and English.

by Mae West Found in: Funny Quotes, Language Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  13  /  17  

There's one more terrifying fact about old people: I'm going to be one soon.

There's one more terrifying fact about old people: I'm going to be one soon.

by Pj O'rourke Found in: Funny Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  18  /  10  

If we're not supposed to eat animals, how come they're made out of meat?

If we're not supposed to eat animals, how come they're made out of meat?

by Tom Snyder Found in: Funny Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  50  /  23  

If you were half as funny as you think you are, you'd be twice as funny as you are now.

If you were half as funny as you think you are, you'd be twice as funny as you are now.

by Cassandra Clare Found in: Funny Quotes,
Share to:
Maxioms Web Pet