Most people don't realize that large pieces of coral, which have been painted brown and attached to the skull by read more

Most people don't realize that large pieces of coral, which have been painted brown and attached to the skull by common wood screws, can make a child look like a deer.

The British tourist was asked
what he thought of the
Grand Canyon.. and wrote
back
'gorge-ous'.

The British tourist was asked
what he thought of the
Grand Canyon.. and wrote
back
'gorge-ous'.

I wish outer space guys would conquer the Earth and make people their pets, because I'd like to have one read more

I wish outer space guys would conquer the Earth and make people their pets, because I'd like to have one of those little beds with my name on it.

A well-developed sense of humor is the pole that adds balance to your steps as you walk the tightrope of read more

A well-developed sense of humor is the pole that adds balance to your steps as you walk the tightrope of life.

I've always been very zealous about not invading other people's private spaces.

I've always been very zealous about not invading other people's private spaces.

Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's read more

Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's carrying a beautiful rose in his beak, and also he's carrying a very beautiful painting with his feet. And also, you're drunk.

I wish there were more humor in my work than I see in it.

I wish there were more humor in my work than I see in it.

A joke is an epigram on the death of a feeling.

A joke is an epigram on the death of a feeling.

Humor is always based on a modicum of truth. Have you ever heard a joke about a father-in-law.

Humor is always based on a modicum of truth. Have you ever heard a joke about a father-in-law.