Life is too short to stuff a mushroom.

Life is too short to stuff a mushroom.

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian
because I hate plants.

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian
because I hate plants.

Food has replaced sex in my life, now I can't even get into my own pants

Food has replaced sex in my life, now I can't even get into my own pants

A good, honest, wholesome, hungry breakfast.

A good, honest, wholesome, hungry breakfast.

Forget love, I'd rather fall in chocolate.

Forget love, I'd rather fall in chocolate.

You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I\'m not hungry enough to eat six.

You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I\'m not hungry enough to eat six.

I love you like a fat kid loves cake.

I love you like a fat kid loves cake.

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

Sacred cows make the best hamburger

Sacred cows make the best hamburger