The British tourist was asked
what he thought of the
Grand Canyon.. and wrote
back
'gorge-ous'.

The British tourist was asked
what he thought of the
Grand Canyon.. and wrote
back
'gorge-ous'.

Synods are mystical Bear-gardens.
Where Elders, Deputies, Church-wardens,
And other Members of the Court,
read more

Synods are mystical Bear-gardens.
Where Elders, Deputies, Church-wardens,
And other Members of the Court,
Manage the Babylonish sport.

The most wasted day of all is that in which we have not laughed.

The most wasted day of all is that in which we have not laughed.

I am no longer a curmudgeon.
I am a curmudgeon emeritus.

I am no longer a curmudgeon.
I am a curmudgeon emeritus.

There's a woman in China having a baby every 6 minutes.
They're trying to find her to stop her.

There's a woman in China having a baby every 6 minutes.
They're trying to find her to stop her.

We have just enough religion to make us hate, but not enough to make us love one another.

We have just enough religion to make us hate, but not enough to make us love one another.

Religion brought forth riches, and the daughter devoured the
mother.
[Lat., Religio peperit divitias et filia devoravit matrem.]

Religion brought forth riches, and the daughter devoured the
mother.
[Lat., Religio peperit divitias et filia devoravit matrem.]

Anybody with a sense of humor is going to put on my album and laugh from beginning to end.

Anybody with a sense of humor is going to put on my album and laugh from beginning to end.

If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is 'God is crying.' read more

If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is 'God is crying.' And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is 'Probably because of something you did.'