One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. 'Oh, no,' I said, 'Disneyland burned down.' He cried and cried, but I think that deep down he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late.
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Humor is by far the most significant activity of the human brain.
Humor is by far the most significant activity of the human brain.
I've always been very zealous about not invading other people's private spaces.
I've always been very zealous about not invading other people's private spaces.
The real reason for comedy is to hide the pain.
The real reason for comedy is to hide the pain.
With the fearful strain that is on me night and day, if I did not laugh I should die.
With the fearful strain that is on me night and day, if I did not laugh I should die.
Humor is mankind's greatest blessing.
Humor is mankind's greatest blessing.
I said that Sean Hannity took residence up Newt Gingrich's
butt from 94 to 98. I got that from British read more
I said that Sean Hannity took residence up Newt Gingrich's
butt from 94 to 98. I got that from British intelligence.
It turns out he only took up residence in 95.
If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking in a mirror, because I bet that will really throw read more
If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking in a mirror, because I bet that will really throw you into a panic.
To me, it's a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you walk around. That way, if read more
To me, it's a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you walk around. That way, if anybody says, 'Hey, can you give me a hand?' you can say, 'Sorry, got these sacks.'
When a person can no longer laugh at himself, it is time for others to laugh at him.
When a person can no longer laugh at himself, it is time for others to laugh at him.
