Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.

Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.

Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself

Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself

To know one's self is wisdom, but not to know one's neighbors is genius.

To know one's self is wisdom, but not to know one's neighbors is genius.

Borrow money from a pessimist - they don't expect it back

Borrow money from a pessimist - they don't expect it back

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.

As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.

As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.

I have met a lot of hardboiled eggs in my time, but you're twenty minutes.

I have met a lot of hardboiled eggs in my time, but you're twenty minutes.

I buy expensive suits. They just look cheap on me.

I buy expensive suits. They just look cheap on me.

What you get free costs too much.

What you get free costs too much.