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Wearing a turtleneck is like being strangled by a really weak guy, all day. Wearing a backpack and a turtleneck read more
Wearing a turtleneck is like being strangled by a really weak guy, all day. Wearing a backpack and a turtleneck is like a weak midget trying to bring you down.
I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the ordeal of meeting me is another read more
I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the ordeal of meeting me is another matter.
A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.
Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.
A girl phoned me the other day and said... 'Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over. Nobody was read more
A girl phoned me the other day and said... 'Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over. Nobody was home.
A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere.
A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere.
Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans
Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans
A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story read more
Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.
