Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.

Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.

I went to a fight the other night, and a hockey game broke out.

I went to a fight the other night, and a hockey game broke out.

I've seen the future and it's much like the present only longer.

I've seen the future and it's much like the present only longer.

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are read more

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes.

This suspense is terrible. I hope it will last.

This suspense is terrible. I hope it will last.

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.

Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards?

Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards?